Strive to Live

There are stories when a man, who is dying, gain just enough strength to retrieve and strive to live. We have much of those inspirational stories that are truly heartfelt and motivating. We also have stories when suddenly a man, who lost all the push to live, finds a reason to continue with this journey called life. We have much of those that it is almost going to be a cliche. Seriously, I find those stories typical and lame to give me extra strength to look beyond what is laid; to walk an extra mile; to do things beyond what is expected.

I have so much knowledge about what to do on a right time at the right place. What I am lacking is the push to do those things. Actually, I find this problem very typical when it comes to people who was expected to do and give their best without given much love and attention. In my unofficial study, people tend to seek for acceptance and love. Once found, every thing may fall into right place. The downfall is quite risky. When a certain person was unable to find acceptance and love, he tends to be suicidal. The latter happened to me. I am a seeker. I seek for acceptance and love I once lost along the way. I found nothing. And here comes the idea to end my life that way. I lost the appetite to continue with this "nightmare" and move on with another nightmare. My principle and this idea wrestled for quite a long time until something unusual happens.

We have a pet cat whose name is Fuji. Actually, she's adopted. My sister saw her along a sidewalk and took her home. At first, we are not into adopting another cat since we have Black Tiger. But, then again, she insisted to adopt Fuji. We have nothing to do but to give in with what she wanted. Fuji is weak when we adopted her. We thought her life wouldn't last long. It happened Fuji got sick that made her numb. She almost die. She used to just drop her body whereever her strength failed her to bring herself to her bed. Yes, Fuji has a bed. My sister, because of her love for Fuji, prepared a bed for her. Blezi, my sister, never left Fuji alone. She tend to give her water whenever Fuji needs to drink; food whenever shes hungry. I felt the love of my sister for her dying pet. Suddenly, it seemed like magic. Fuji regained her strength and stood as if she had no sick. It doesn't just stop there. It happens for the third time now. 

The love of my sister for her pet gives Fuji the reason to live and strive to live longer. It seems like Fuji finds her strength in my sister. Her undying love for her pet shows that love gives us reason to live and keeps us going. early this day, I was observing Fuji as how she struggled for her life. I told her if she's tired and wants to rest, she's free to do so. However, her actions told me she wants to live longer--that though it is hard for her, she wants to live for my sister and for us as well. If only she could speak a word, maybe this is what she's going to tell me: "I found reason to live, so why should I surrender easily with this sickness? Your sister's love for me is enough to motivate me to keep going. Yes, it is hard, but I know I can get through it. I have won this battle twice, I know I can do it once again." 

This brings me to my being. This pet has a reason to live. She strives for life though it is hard because she knows someone out there loves her ultimately. She pinched my heart with her low voice and  stuttering response. I almost cry, seriously. Why did I want to end my life this way though I know somebody out there loves me and loves me very much? Sometimes, we only need somebody (or something) to remind us of what life is all about. Sometimes, even the littlest things in life show us that there is something more in life that are yet to rediscover. Fuji motivates me to keep going. My principle that life is meant for Him, not for me. It is not about me, it is about Him, ALL about Him. 

I thank Him for giving Fuji and for keeping her alive. I pray she'd be fine soon. I know she will.